Tuesday, March 31, 2009
For A Laugh
WIMPY DADS
Two kids are arguing over whose father is the biggest scaredy-cat.
The first kid says, "My dad is so scared that when lightning strikes, he hides underneath the bed.
"The second kid replies, "Yeah? Well, that's nothing. My dad is so scared that when my mom has to work the nightshift, he sleeps with the woman nextdoor."
HOW TO SAVE THE AIRLINES
Dump the male flight attendants. No one wanted them in the first place.Replace all the female flight attendants with good-looking strippers! Whatthe hell -- They don't even serve food anymore, so what's the loss?
The strippers would at least triple the alcohol sales and get a "party atmosphere" going in the cabin. And, of course, every businessman in this country would start flying again, hoping to see naked women. Because of the tips, female flight attendants wouldn't need a salary, thus saving even more money. I suspect tips would be so good that we could charge the women for working the plane and have them kick back 20% of the tips, including lap dances and "special services."
Muslims would be afraid to get on the planes for fear of seeing naked women. Hijackings would come to a screeching halt, and the airline industry wouldsee record revenues. This is definitely a win-win situation if we handle itright -- a golden opportunity to turn a liability into an asset.
Why didn't Bush think of this? I still have to do everything!
Sincerely,
Bill Clinton
Contributed by : Estrelita Soliano Grosse.
Monday, March 30, 2009
Mystery – Of Being Yourself
Different people use different strategy to deal with the problems they encounter. Usually, biting problems can be churned to our advantage by believing in ourselves.
Sunday, March 29, 2009
The Sentiment of the Rakyat
The rhetoric in the UMNO General Assembly was for bashing on those outside UMNO. They can scream their heads off, but the bottom line is how the people outside UMNO think, is more important.
Defensive people can never be open-minded about new ideas but to spew venom upon the listeners whom he/she finds a threat to his/her position. To the rhetors, those who disagree are the enemies to them and such inferior perception must be ground into dirt.
How pathetic it is to be paranoid and to think that ridiculing or attacking is the most effective way to "win" the argument. Unless practical reason with cooperative approach with the rakyat is considered rather than confrontational rhetoric, the UMNO rhetors might as well keep dreaming to be strong.
Yes! UMNO can become stronger because UMNO will not learn.
Racism is the tool to garner the Malays sympathy. Not all the Malays choose to listen to such crab because they have not forgotten what Zaid Ibrahim said about the good qualities of the Malays.
When will UMNO learn that a pinch of politeness to state their stand will work far better than a pound of verbal abuse thrown at will? The rakyat acknowledges that UMNO is weak, the disunity within with power struggle has left the country in a wanting state of economy, lost of employment and the dreaded of all, the ugly head of racism.
Why not? UMNO can reinvent.
How? Wanting to reinvent without Tengku Razaleigh will be far-fetch! To reinvent, UMNO has to start from scratch, that is, to be the Opposition.
The ethos in Tengku Razaleigh and Zaid Ibrahim are frown upon in UMNO. Why? They are far too intelligent and their foresight has gone down well with the rakyat on the whole. As such, UMNO people do not see them as assets to the party and country but a threat to remove them from sitting in the cushion of advantage.
Saturday, March 28, 2009
The Mystery of Odd Dressers
Many, somehow or rather will complain about his/her appearance, be it weight, hair, skin or height or anything that he/she can fault. By doing so, they forget about his/her own good qualities.
People dress oddly because they want to get noticed. Or they might want to fit into a group, like the idiotic group. It is impossible not to analyse as soon as we see one odd dresser. To judge is the human nature but not to be judgmental, yet it is impossible to ignore it completely.
Anyone who chooses to dress in this way and enticing the beholder to see the rest, at least wear underwear. To wear underwear, then you will be disappointed because exhibitionism is the trend today!
Friday, March 27, 2009
Self-Development?
So why pay thousands of dollars to attend talks when your grand-parents, parents, spouses and even the auntie who sweeps the floor can give you the same kind of advice FOC, every day?
1. England has madcow,Hong Kong has Macau,Russia has Moscow,S'pore has 2 famous cows-'Cow-peh and cow-bo'
2. When ur life is in darkness......Pray 2 God and ask Him 2 free u from darkness..... andIf u r still in darkness..Pls pay ur TNB bill.
3.If u need ADVICE, SMS ME,If u need DARLING, CALL ME, If u need HELP, E-MAIL ME,IF U NEED MONEY, Nombor yang anda dail,tiada dalam perkhidmatan kami, Terima Kasih.
Dear Ah Lian,
Thanks you for your letter. Wrong time no see you. How everything? For me, I am quiet find.
You say in your letter your taukeh soh want you to chain your look? Somemore you must wear kick kok soo, hope you can wok properly.
You know, Ah Kau Kia working in a soft where company now. Last week, he take I, Muthu & few of his friend to May Nonut To eat barger. After that he take we all go to kalah ok. Muthu sing and sing no stop until the sky bright.
Next week, my father mother going to seller bread 20 years Annie wear sari. My father mother going to give a fist to all the kampong people. So you must come with your hole family.
I only hope one day we no need to write and send letter to you and to me. Better I e-meow you, you e-meow me. I will ketchup with you soon. And when you got time, please few free to call me. Goo bye.....
Worm regard,
Ah Beng
Note: Ah Beng is equivalent to a blonde man and Ah Lian to a blonde girl in the jokes fraternity.
Contributed by: Estrelita Soliano Groose.
Can Najib Be The Sixth PM?
Thursday, March 26, 2009.
Fulfillment of the last letter “N under the RAHMAN Prophesy.
For the RAHMAN prophesy to be fulfilled completely, the successor to Ahmad Abdullah Badawi has to have “N” on his first letter in his name.
The current Deputy Prime Minister’s name is Mohd Najib Abdul Razak ie his first letter is “M”. By extension of that fact, and for the RAHMAN prophesy to hold true as it did for the last 39 years, Najib will NOT be the next Prime Minister, even if he had been elected as the President of UMNO.
The fact that Mohd Najib had been commonly called as simply Najib , thus assuming “N” as his first letter in his name does not count in the RAHMAN prophesy. For instance, Najib’s father was commonly referred to as Tun Razak. If the RAHMAN prophesy had allowed “R” to be the first letter of the name to be considered, then the RAHMAN predicted would have collapsed in 1970 when Tun Razak assumed office of the Prime Minister.
All other Deputy Prime Ministers ( with the exception of Abdul Ghaffar Baba and Anwar Ibrahim), who did not meet the conditions of the RAHMAN prophesy, FAILED to become the next Prime Minister.
Mohd Najib Abdul Razak
The current Prime Minister, Ahmad Abdullah Badawi was expected to step down as President of UMNO following the completion of the 2009 UMNO General Assembly on 27th March 2009.Malaysians are expecting Mohd Najib to be the next President of UMNO and by convention, he will be installed as the 6th Prime Minister.
If Mohd Najib does succeed Ahmad Abdullah Badawi as the 6th Prime Minister, then it will be the FIRST time in 39 years that the RAHMAN prophesy has failed to predict the last (6th) Prime Minister with the name starting with the letter “N” in RAHMAN.
However, as noted by Tengku Razaleigh, Dr Mahathir and other political pundits, Mohd Najib’s ascension as President of UMNO does not constitutionally require that he will be installed as the Prime Minister of Malaysia.
The following events may still cause the RAHMAN prophesy to hold true after the 2009 UMNO General Assembly:
a) Although Mohd Najib becomes the President of UMNO, Ahmad Abdullah Badawi may wish to continue to be the Prime Minister of Malaysia as provided for in the constitution until he is given a vote of no confidence in Parliament. The RAHMAN prophesy remains intact. If this is the case, this will be the first time that a President of UMNO is not automatically made the Prime Minister of Malaysia.b) The Yang DiPertuan Agung has the absolute discretion not to appoint Mohd Najib as the Prime Minister and he would either request Ahmad Abdullah Badawi to continue as Prime Minister until the next general election or the Agong may recall Parliament to decide on whether Mohd Najib or somebody else will be the Prime Minister.
As it stands, the RAHMAN prophesy says Mohd Najib Abdul Razak will not be the 6th Prime Minister, given it had stood the test of time of 39 years over 4 Prime Ministers and 9 Deputy Prime Ministers.
Malaysians will know in the days and weeks to come whether the RAHMAN prophesy will collapse without fulfilling the last letter “N”.
malaysianunplug.
What A Crying Shame!
We know that peace and prosperity cannot be achieved without partnerships involving Governments, international organizations, the business community and the civil society itself. In today’s world, we depend on each other to co-exist.
To my knowledge, civil society includes charities, neighbourhood self-help schemes, improving health, education and living-standards. But the most important of all is the human rights campaigns in a repressive society should be unbridled, to allow the people an avenue to their constitutional rights to vent their grievances.
By taking to the streets is not the answer, but a necessity when the people have exhausted all avenues available to them. When politicians from the government are faced with such a situation of, needs must when the devil drives, then mass arrest becomes inevitable.
I could not help but to agree with their disappointments, least to say their anger. The support from the politician(s) who was voted into office by the people was vividly missing!
Wednesday, March 25, 2009
LATEST
Public support was obviously lacking. The possible fine of RM2,000 or 1 year jail for each charge.
They were advised to reconsider their plea and more may turn up to plead guilty tomorrow.
Is this how the struggle should end? Malaysians please come forward to show you care and support.
Afterall, didn't they help to create the Tsunami of March 8?
Reported by : Segeran.
Note: I know a few will make it to the court tomorrow.
THE FOUR CANDLES
The world is full of anger and fighting.
Nobody can keep me lit.
Then, the flame of PEACE went out completely.
The SECOND CANDLE said, “I am FAITH”
I am no longer indispensable.
It doesn’t make sense that I stay lit another moment.
Just then, a breeze softly blew away the flame of FAITH.
Sadly, the THIRD CANDLE began to speak, “I am LOVE”
People don’t understand my importance so they simply put me aside.
They even forget to love those who are nearest to them.
And waiting no longer, the flame of LOVE went out.
Suddenly, a child entered the room and saw the THREE unlit CANDLES.
“Why aren’t you burning? You’re supposed to stay lit until the end!”
Saying this, the child began to cry.
Then, the FOURTH CANDLE answered.
“Don’t be afraid my child, I am HOPE. While I am still burning, we can re-light the other candles”
With shining eyes, the child took the candle of HOPE and lit the other candles.
With HOPE, each of us can live with PEACE, FAITH and LOVE.